‘I Never Had Friends…Like The Ones When I was 12.’

  “I never had any friends later on like the ones I had when I was 12.” Stand By Me (film).


Luckily that’s not strictly true on my part. The friends I had when I was twelve are still in my life now and I know, for that, I am blessed.  In the film the four boys go on the discovery and the of a lifetime.  My friends and I are still on that discovery and adventure of a life time, only it is life.  The boys in the film go to see a dead body and they find it; it affects them all, and I imagine shapes the rest of their lives.  Eighteen years later and we (my group of friends) are still discovering things that shape our lives and we continue to deal with things as shocking, upsetting and horrifying as dead bodies.  These friends however, are the ones who live things with you.  They are your chosen family and become part of the very person you are.

Despite being all over the world, we are all trying to make a life and bumbling through choices and decisions that have a real impact.  We may not see each other every day, as we did when we were twelve, but we are always there for each other if needed.  We have an agreement – if at any point one of us says ‘Big Fat SHIT,’ then one of us, it doesn’t matter which, will get to the one who said it.  No matter where they are, one of us will be there.

Life is one hell of a bastard at times, but knowing my friends are on my team and forever in my corner makes this life a little bit easier.  Of course, you meet other friends along the way, people you hold very dear, people you treasure and always will but it’s just not the same.  It’s probably too late to tell your 12-year-old self to hold on tight to your friends but do tell any 12 year olds that you know – do not let go.  Warn them that they’ll need them, always, and that their friends will in fact shape their lives, for the better in my experience.  (You know who you are.)

Do any of us ever have friends later on like the ones we had when we were 12?



Graffiti – Purest Form Of Art



‘Since writing on toilet walls is done neither for critical acclaim, nor financial rewards, it is the purest form of art – discuss.’

I once saw this written in a toilet cubicle; –  how advanced is that compared to the usual diatribe of ‘Shelly is a slut,’ ‘Call (insert your own phone number or the number of someone you hate here) for a good time,’ ‘Maria loves John,’ ‘Simon Hall has got chlamydia,’ or something equally mundane.  Declarations of love on toilet walls may well be cute, but I’ve got news for you darling; – unless you are in a same sex relationship, your other half is highly unlikely to see your thoughtful declaration.  Nor will Simon Hall ever know that his unfortunate sexual health history is there for public viewing (may I remind you that we are in the ladies’ bathroom!)

This particular piece of art caught my eye but I was disappointed to see that nobody had taken the graffiti artist up on their offer to discuss.  Now, as much as I like to study the walls of bathroom stalls, I have never actually partaken in the activity myself – my Mum would not be happy!  And so, I couldn’t reply but I got to thinking about what I may reply with.  The art of graffiti is (unless you’re Shelly or Maria or maybe Simon) usually anonymous and so this statement is true in that people are not commenting for acclaim or reward.  Are we then, whole heartedly honest on bathroom walls?  Is Shelly really a slut?  Imagine if some of our literary greats started their careers on toilet walls.  Or if world leaders and politicians campaigned in the form of graffiti – people might pay more attention to them.  A different mode of communication!

I also got to wondering if toilet wall art and words, written by the general public, was the earliest form of social media.  People appear to feel the need to share their lives and deepest feelings on the various social media platforms such as Facebook, Instagram and Twitter.  Was it these same people that previously wrote on the toilet walls, their deepest and darkest feelings and thoughts out there for Joe Public to read?  Maybe writing on toilet walls was and still is the purest form of expression due to it anonymity which you don’t have on social media platforms.

Anything that you express in a toilet cubicle can eventually, unlike social media, be retracted.  If Maria no longer loves John she has the option to cover this up with more equally witty graffiti, or she can hope that the bathroom will receive a make – over or the walls a scrub, resulting in her addition to the cubicle being removed.  It is not so easy to remove statements that you have made on the internet – it can usually be traced and Facebook, in fact, likes to provide us with the memory, years after.

So, perhaps my response in the discussion to this may simply be ‘agreed.’  I think the bathroom is the one place where (usually) we can be totally alone and perhaps our truest self.  Perhaps you were expecting something more in depth.

What would be your response?  Since writing on toilet walls is done neither for critical acclaim, nor financial reward, it is the purest form of art – discuss…







Bathroom Behaviour

The average person spends one hour and forty-two minutes on the toilet each week!  That statistic is for the average person; it does not include those that spend more or less time in there but that is a whole other topic.  So, with that fact in mind, surely there is much that needs discussing; I must add that that is time spent actually on the toilet, not just in the bathroom.  It is bathroom behaviour in general which will be more of the focus here.

Public bathrooms can offer all sorts to the average user and it is in paying attention whilst in there that I have learnt, heard, witnessed and noticed a lot.  Due to the limitations of my being female, it should also be noted that another of the main focuses here will indeed be ladies’ bathrooms.

You would think that we go in there, primarily, for one purpose and that we would complete that activity and leave as quickly as possible, however, so much more happens in these areas.  Bathrooms can be a source of information, where gossip and the latest trends are discussed.  There is much to be over herd if you listen carefully and much to be learnt.  Friendships and bonds can be struck up in there, as can they be ended and fall outs can happen.  Perfectly civil, and some un – civil, conversations with perfect strangers can occur.  There can be moments of laughter, and tears happen too.  Items and advice are often shared in bathrooms and people, for the most part, are kind and nice to each other.  These are the niceties of bathrooms and undoubtedly there are horrors too; in a sense, bathrooms have it all.  They are non – exclusive, used by people the world over and to me, they are a source of interest and intrigue.  So, welcome to my toilet blog!




Unisex Urinals…


That title is probably something I never thought I would say or use as a title but it is and they exist and females use them.  The only place I have seen them is at music festivals in the UK and I can report that the facilities were always busy, with both sexes.  They have begun to limit congestion a little at the portable toilets at festivals and the usual predominantly female queues.  I have witnessed many females, embracing the unisex urinals and enjoying the speed of their visit.  How?  You may ask; and you’d be forgiven for doing so.

Well, may I introduce to you the ‘Shewee.’  It is indeed a device that enables females to urinate whilst standing up and therefor use urinals.  Plastic (washable I would hope) versions are available, as are cardboard (one time use I’d imagine) ones that can then be discarded.  Some women have advised that they find it liberating and some have said they use it purely because it is very practical.  It is basically a funnel that is shaped at one end and has a pipe for the liquid to escape at the other end and it can be used without removing any of your clothes.  You simply slip articles of clothing to the side to then hold your ‘Shewee’ in place and ‘go.’

There are bound to be incidents in which there are accidents, leaks or dribbles but to quote one female avid fan of them, “at least I know it’s my wee on me and no one else’s.”  She believes urinals and the use of a ‘Shewee’ is a far more hygienic option at a festival than the other forms of bathroom facilities available.  Apparently, they are handy too for long car journeys, when you are camping or when travelling in some countries.

It may take some time before the world gets used to seeing both sexes standing up at urinals but eventually it may be whole heartedly embraced?  Perhaps in the future all female bathrooms will have urinals installed and it will be the norm?


I’d love to hear from you if you have embraced the ‘Shewee’ revolution!




Graffiti Gold!

Graffiti Gems

Whilst graffiti is very unsightly and an absolute pain for the owners and managers of the establishment being attacked by the graffiti, I actually find in quite amusing.  A bit of entertainment when you visit the bathroom.  Most of the literature is utterly pointless, some of it funny, some of it sad and some is actually quite thought provoking and powerful.  Here I list some of the little gems I have found.

  • ‘If I could sue you I would – for emotional whiplash.’
  • ‘People react more than they act.’
  • ‘A woman is like a tea bag – you’ll never know how strong she is until she’s in hot water.’
  • ‘My hangover is from the bowels of hell!’
  • ‘My favourite thing about Frankie and Bennies (the restaurant chain) is learning Italian in the bog. CIAO.’
  • ‘Your opinion is a bit like an orgasm – once I’ve had mine, I’m no longer interested.’
  • ‘There is a finish line – you cannot give up half way.’
  • ‘The truth is that all problems seem very simple once they have been resolved.’
  • ‘You can grow flowers from where dirt used to be.’
  • ‘My get up and go has got up and went.’
  • ‘Get yourself a good bed and a good pair of heels because if you’re not in one, you’re in the other.’
  • ‘You are the measure of my dreams.’
  • ‘Sometimes on the way to the dream you get lost and find another one.’
  • ‘It is what it is.’
  • ‘You only find your limits by pushing them further.’
  • ‘The question of duty brings me to this point; where what I am meets what I say I am.’
  • ‘You are the shape I still like to imagine myself; you are the body double for my stale ambitions.’
  • ‘Do you idealise the past or see it as broken?’
  • ‘We buy things we don’t need, with money we don’t have, to impress people we don’t like.’ In response to this someone wrote; ‘We vandalise things that aren’t ours, with quotes we didn’t write, to impress people taking a shit.’
  • ‘Silence is golden but duct tape is silver.’


Sex and the City – Quote Heaven

Ah, Sex and the City, a T.V show based on the literary works of Candace Bushnell, that captured a generation (mostly female) and, for the most part, gave them hope. Here are some of the brilliant quotes that made us laugh, cry and somewhat optimistic.

  • ‘Maybe we can be each other’s soul mates. And then we can let men be just these great, nice guys to have fun with.’
  • ‘When life gets this confusing, there is only one thing to do: attend a fabulous party!’
  • ‘Are we simply romantically challenged, or are we sluts?’
  • ‘But if you love someone and you break up, where does the love go?’
  • ‘I thing I have monogamy. I caught it from you people.’
  • ‘They say nothing lasts forever, dreams change, trends come and go, but friendships never go out of style.’
  • ‘Can you make a mistake and miss your fate?’
  • ‘Maybe our mistakes are what make our fate. Without them, what would shape our lives?’
  • ‘The universe may not always play fair, but at least it’s got one hell of a sense of humour.’
  • ‘I heard the weather this morning but they didn’t say anything about a shit storm.’
  • ‘No matter how far you travel, or how fast you run, can you ever really escape your past?’
  • ‘Somewhere out there is another little freak who will love us and understand us and kiss our three heads and make it all better.’
  • ‘Did I ever really love Big (John) or was I addicted to the pain, the exquisite pain, of wanting someone so unattainable?’
  • ‘You have to let go of who you were to become who you will be.’
  • ‘The hard thing about fighting in relationships is that there’s no referee. There’s no one to tell you which comments are below the belt.’
  • ‘We emotionally compartmentalise our lives.’
  • ‘The most important thing in life is your family. There are days you love them, and others you don’t, but in the end, they’re the people you always come home to. Sometimes it’s the family you’re born into and sometimes it’s the one you make for yourself.’
  • ‘I’m looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can’t – live – without – each – other – love.’
  • ‘No matter who broke you heart, or how long it takes to heal, you’ll never get through it without your friends.’
  • ‘And we were dressed from head to toe in love, the style that never goes out of fashion.’

Toilet Trivia

Toilet Trivia

Just some little snippets of toilet trivia to brighten up a dull day…

  • World Toilet Day is the 19th of November. Do be sure to celebrate it!
  • The average person goes to the toilet roughly 2500 times a year – that’s a lot of trips to the loo and a lot of our lifetimes in there.
  • Shockingly, the UN estimate that 2.5 billion people lack access to a toilet and it is said that more people in the world have mobile phones than toilets.
  • Apparently the first toilet in the row (nearest the door) is the cleanest as people go further down the row seeking more privacy. Didn’t we used to be told that the last one was the cleanest because people are lazy?
  • A study by the World Toilet Organisation shows that the more features your smart phone has, the longer you sit on the toilet. Candy Crush has a lot to answer for.
  • Every time we flush the toilet, we flush an average of six litres of water.
  • King George II (of Great Britain) died after falling off a toilet in 1760. What a way to go…
  • On average 20% of people do not wash their hands after they visit the toilet – we’ve all seen them. (Not) surprisingly only 77% of males wash their hands compared to 93% of women.
  • Your mobile phone is said to have eighteen times more bacteria on it than toilet handles. Note to self – must start disinfecting it.
  • Three out of four people hang their toilet roll with the flap of paper to the front, unwinding the roll over the spool as opposed to under. The position of the roll is much debated and massively important to some people.
  • There is an entire museum dedicated to toilets in India – The Sulabh International Museum of Toilets is in New Delhi. Perhaps it’s worth a visit?
  • There is a chain of toilet themed restaurants in Taiwan that serve food and drinks in miniature toilet bowls. Who’s coming with me to this original dining experience?
  • If TS Eliot has his initials reversed his name would read ‘toilets’ backwards. Quite poetic really.
  • In 1883 A. Ashwell (an English man) patented the Engaged and Vacant signs for public toilets. Presumably he earnt a penny or two rather than ‘spending a penny.’

And there you have it – some little-known points of useless information (you are welcome). Rx

‘We Must Let Go Of The Life We Had Planned…’

‘We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.’ – Joseph Campbell
How many of us are sitting reading this (when perhaps we should be doing something else – like working) wondering how we got to where we are and what happened to the life we had planned. Perhaps we had aspirations to have a career in a certain field, perhaps we wanted to be family people – a wife or mother, father or husband. Maybe we wanted to travel the world and see all the wonders that it has to offer. Some of us will have wanted to be loved, to be happy is what we wanted. Too many of us will have had expectations placed on them – what other people thought they should do and some will have done just that. I imagine that at some point we have all dreamt of being rich. A lot of us probably had no idea what we wanted and many are still figuring that out. Good luck to you.
For those of us that did have an idea and a plan in our minds, I wonder how far along we are with that plan. What have we achieved in terms of that plan we had? In my experience, life often gets in the way of what we had planned and can throw us some almighty curveballs. So, does everything happen for a reason and lead us to the life that is waiting for us?
Said curveballs come in all shapes, forms and sizes in life and are all relative to the individual; these curveballs then tend to form into something else and push us in a different direction – perhaps to the life that is waiting for us. It is difficult but we have to try to embrace the curveballs and go with the flow. If we spend a whole lifetime trying to live up to or live by what we had thought and planned, we could potentially spend that lifetime missing everything. Missing life – missing all that it is offering and providing.
Who can know why we end up where we do, living the life we do and with the people we have in it but it happens. It is someone’s plan for us, not necessarily your plan, but there is some reason for it. So, embrace it, enjoy it, be challenged by it, take the rough and the smooth and accept the life that is waiting for you.

Toilet Television

Having just returned from a wonderful trip to Sydney I must tell all about one of my highlights from the weekend and yes, it involves a bathroom!
We were there to attend a rugby game at Allianz Stadium (The Sydney Football Stadium) and I was hugely impressed at the bathroom facilities. Admittedly there was the usual need to queue to use the bathroom, as is always the case at large event. Particularly for women – the queues are extraordinary, but once I actually got into the bathroom I was pleasantly surprised. After waiting in the queue that wrapped around the bathroom and the corridor outside (admittedly it was at half time in the game – probably the busiest time to attempt to use the facilities) I eventually got in to the bathroom, pleased to be nearing the end of the queue. Then, there in the optimal position for viewing pleasure from the final stages of the queue, was a television. It was showing the rugby game in real time – what a magnificent idea (the break period was over in the time I had been in the queue and the game had now begun again).
One of the main aspects of timing your toilet breaks at such events is doing so in such a way that means you miss as little as possible of the event. However, let’s be real – when you’ve got to go, you’ve got to go; you can’t always time these things, only hope that you have allowed for queuing time and not left it too late. Problem solved in these bathrooms! Go when you want and watch the game from in there, you’re not going to miss any of the action. One massive high five to the person that thought of that!
Get yourself a wall mounted television NOW and get it hung on the bathroom wall… your toilet users (no matter who they are) will appreciate it!

Children’s Honesty


The ladies’ bathroom (as I’ve previously mentioned) can be a source of all sorts of information; and in this case, humorous interactions were over heard.

My partner and I had decided to have a weekend away, visiting and staying on our favourite camp site that looked out onto the beach.  One evening I was using the camp’s amenities to clean my face and brush my teeth when a young girl of about five and her Mum entered the facilities.  She was a rather cute wee thing and clearly having a great time camping, chatting to her mother about the tent and the sand castle that she had built that day at the beach.  In the usual polite etiquette of public bathroom behaviour, I smiled at the Mum and her daughter.  They both went into toilet stalls and I carried on cleaning my face.

They were in separate stalls and so the child chatted to her Mum from a distance unaware or uncaring of my remaining presence.

‘Mummy are you pooing too.’  Mum did not respond but flushed the toilet and came out of her cubicle.

‘Mum.  Are you pooing?’

‘No darling, I’m finished now and waiting outside for you.’  The mum responded as she stood at the sink next to me, washing her hands.  She caught my eye in the mirror and rolled her eyes… ‘kids,’ her look said.

‘But you said you needed to poo Mum.  Why are you not pooing?’  Mum caught my eye again.  She looked embarrassed and I was trying not to laugh or smile and show my amusement in any way.  It was a slightly awkward position the mum and I found ourselves in.

‘Just concentrate on yourself,’ Mum urged.

‘I am mum, and I’m trying really hard.  It’s a really big one!’  Mum at this point, didn’t know where to look.  ‘Maybe you should sit down and try again Mum and do a really big one too.  You said you needed to poo Mum.’  The little girl continued, mum was now blushing.  Two strangers stood listening to one of their bowl movements being discussed in all its intricate detail.

‘Are you going to try to poo Mum?’  She continued.

‘No darling, I’m just waiting for you,’ the Mum replied as she paced the bathroom in the hope of avoiding eye contact with myself.

‘I’m very disappointed in you Mum, you need to poo and you’re not trying,’ the girl chided as her mother had presumably done to her in the past.  At this both mum and I laughed quietly and I left the amenity block marvelling at how honest children can be, even when adults tried to cover up – Mum needed to poo, I’m sure of it.

Toilet Police

It is my personal opinion that there is merit in exploring the idea of bathroom police or at least a bathroom steward.  Let me explain why…

How often have you stood in a toilet queue, sometimes an excessively long one, waiting to get into the cubicle.  We have all been there, particularly at big sporting events or musical gigs, any event with a large crowd really; you want to get in and get out so that you don’t miss anything.  As you get closer to the front of the queue, keeping an eye on the doors and on which cubicle has been most recently occupied, you are often unconsciously timing people in your head – working out which one might be available for you soon.  On your approach, I find, that there is significant annoyance in finding that there are numerous cubicles that aren’t actually occupied!  Why?  Why the people at the front of the queue don’t check the doors I will never know.  You cannot always trust that little lock that hovers conspicuously between ‘engaged’ and ‘vacant’ or between red and green.

If you get the feeling that there is a stall with no one in it, test the door.   Just push it gently – you don’t want to push too hard and put on display some unsuspecting person who has simply forgotten to or not managed to lock the door.  But please do check.  Those of us waiting far further back in the queue will be most appreciative.  You can also check for the presence of feet, they are usually a give-away, if you can do so inconspicuously.  I am not advocating that you get down on the floor and peer under a door to check but you can have a subtle glimpse, get a feeling for any movement in that cubicle.  If you sense none then check.

On occasion, I have been that steward, I have been so desperate to get into a cubicle that I have marched to the front of the line ignoring all the tuts and tsks at my apparent ‘skipping of the queue’ and tried a few doors.  As soon as I’ve started ushering people into stalls and when the queue is moving more quickly, then people tend to realise that I was not just pushing in front of them but was in fact trying to do us all a favour.  A steward could do this job permanently.  Okay, so a steward may be overkill and no business is likely to be willing to pay for such an extravagance but it’s an idea.  Or maybe we should take on the roles ourselves.  If you have a notion that a line is extraordinarily long or feel you have been waiting for an inordinate amount of time – get checking those doors, let’s not waste any more time!



Would you do the job?

Judging the Chapter

‘Do not judge my story by the chapter you walked in on.’

Let’s just face facts…  We are all so very quick to judge and we are all (I don’t care who you are) guilty of doing so, at some point.  It is true that some do so more than others but we have all been there, on our high horse of judgement.  Some of us do so on a daily basis, some of us less so and I won’t even take into account the role that I think the media plays in this; – but here goes, I’m being judged as I read this.

On a personal level, I’ve been through some hellish chapters and know I and my actions have been judged – I’ve judged myself!  But rarely do we take into account one’s individual situations – their previous chapters if you like.  We know nothing of what a person’s life entails, their challenges – and triumphs, why people are the way we are.  Despite now sounding like I’m judging people who judge – I’m encouraging myself to stop and think before I open my judgemental floodgates.

We judge (to highlight but a few); what one wears, their sexuality, how one looks, their substance misuse, one’s size and their economic status.  We may judge one’s job or employment status, their children or lack of, their cultural beliefs.  Or one’s criminality, the school they attend, their religion, their housing, their actions and mistakes.

Who are we to do so and on what criteria do we base our judgements?

What if I tell you the clothes that I’m wearing are borrowed – I’ve lost everything I own.  Imagine a world in which we could agree that my sexuality is my business – not anyone else’s.  What if I told you I look the way I do because I’m covering up years of insecurities.  Imagine you realised that I need help – not criticism.  What if I told you I’m overweight (in your eyes) because I’m ill – perhaps I suffer from a medical condition.  Imagine that you realised that I didn’t chose to be poor – I’m a victim of circumstance.  What if I told you that I’m proud of my job, despite what you think – perhaps I have a university degree (better than yours).  Imagine the struggle I’ve had was known to you– it’s not always as easy as knowing and biology.  What if you learnt something about my culture first.  Imagine that you had to steal so that your children could eat – perhaps I’m terribly ashamed.  Imagine you knew that I walked miles to school daily and was raped on my journey daily, maybe you’d realise that I wanted to learn.  What if I told you my views – perhaps (like most) I’m not an extremist.  Imagine feeling safe in a house, that to me is a luxury.  What if I told you that I am the best me that I can be right now – perhaps I used to be ‘worse’ and maybe I regret the mistakes I’ve made (but I did my best) and perhaps I’ve learned.

What if?  Can you imagine?  We as a society are responsible for reading the whole book (and not judging that by its cover!) and not judging the point at which we enter the story, and sticking with it until the end; – perhaps we too will learn something.



Toilet Anger

When you go to a public bathroom the last thing you want to see is a queue.  Why would anyone want to spend more time in a room, crammed full of germs, than is absolutely necessary.  You wouldn’t, and so, a queue is not an ideal thing to be greeted with when you enter the ladies room.  This particular evening, I was in a long queue in this very busy bar.  We were in an Irish bar, Fiddlers Green, in Surfer’s Paradise on the Gold Coast, Australia.  We’d chosen to go there to watch an important game of rugby that was being played in Europe and so allowing for the time difference, this meant that the game was being shown on the television at 1am in Australia.  Fiddlers Green bar was showing the game in amongst the live music they had being performed by an Irish Folk band and the dancing.  So, not only was I faced with a queue when I entered the bathroom, a small and very hot room, I was also faced with some extreme odours.  The people in the bathroom queue were all perspiring at various rates due to either the hot bathroom, or their exuberant Irish Jig type dancing on the dancefloor and the smell of sweat was mingling with regular toilet odours.  Excellent, a hot and sweaty bathroom with a hot and sweaty queue.

Nearing the start of the queue when thankfully it would soon be my turn, I began to keep an eye on the doors of the five stalls, as you do, so as not to miss a vacant one, let anyone nip in before you and begin to get a gage on which one would be available soon.  I watched on as two females went in to a stall together.  There was only one girl in front of me and so I was nearly there.  The said girl in front of me, apparently couldn’t wait much longer, and soon began banging on the doors of the cubicles and urging those inside to hurry up.  Unsure of how her banging on the doors would make any difference to the speed of one’s ablutions, I watched her until there came a very angry reply from inside a cubicle.

‘Stop fucking banging you cunt, I’m going as quick as I can.’

The girl continued to bang on the door, finding this funny and enjoying the reaction she was getting from her group friends who were gathered at the mirrors.

‘I mean it, stop banging or I’ll bang your face!’  (A tad unnecessary for sure.)

The angry and somewhat slurred replies to the banging were coming from the cubicle where I’d watched the two women go into and admittedly they were taking their time but all this shouting was only causing more perspiration surely, what was the point?  As I had pre – predicted would happen, the girl who’d been doing the banging got into another cubicle before the two angry responders were finished and here I was, at the front of the queue now, looking responsible for the banging – the source of their anger.

‘Who the fuck was making all that noise?’  One of the double act, stood at their cubicle door, was demanding to know who was responsible for the banging.  She had the demeanour and glare of a woman that you didn’t want to be on the wrong side of so immediately I put up my hands in what I hoped was a ‘not guilty’ gesture and informed her it wasn’t me.  I just wanted to get out of the smelly, sweaty bathroom in one piece and get back to enjoying my evening.  The woman continued to glare at the rest of the queue who all averted their eyes, not wishing to make eye contact with this fellow enraged toilet user.  The other half of the duo urged her companion to leave it and forget about it and I noticed that the group of girls who had previously been titivating their make-up had slunk out of the bathroom, leaving their banging friend alone.

‘For fuck sake, I can’t even piss in peace!’  The woman, becoming increasingly angrier, shouted and headed for the door (and didn’t wash her hands I might add) and kicked over the bin, full of paper hand towels, in one final angry gesture before leaving the bathroom.  I eventually headed into the empty cubicle, when the anger left the bathroom, and noted that the girl who’d caused it all was still in her cubicle, presumably hiding!